Thursday, January 20, 2011

The Poison of Resentment

I remember catching part of an Oprah Winfey show where she talked about her resentment and anger toward someone. She told how one day from a distance she saw this person coming out of a department store in New York City, bags in hand, and laughing with a friend. Oprah then said something about here she was being angry while this person was actually living her life, having fun and had no clue!

Resentment is a poisonous pill that releases slowly. I read somewhere that resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.We harbor resentment, actively nourishing it with that negative self-talk tape we play over and over again in our heads. It festers like a boil and just poisons us while eroding the relationship. Is it no wonder we find ourselves physically ill when we carry around long-standing resentments toward someone else?

When someone does something or says something to me that I am not comfortable with, I can practice detachment. Rather than swallow the poison of resentment, I tell myself that I don't own it and that it doesn't belong to me. Rather than die inside, I give it up. In this way, I can let the other person take responsibility for something that was never mine. I am now free to go shopping and laugh with a friend or do another activity that gives me pleasure and boosts my self-esteem.

2 comments:

  1. Oh Kelly, what an inspirational post! I love it! I think most of us have been there. Although it's human to feel resentment, it's also human to forgive. We also have free will so letting go of this feeling is the best way to free ourselves. Thank you for sharing this lovely post.

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  2. Thank you, Claudia! And I so agree with you about forgiveness. At the same time, we must learn to also forgive ourselves.

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