Forgiveness Starts with the Self

If you could forgive one person in your life who would it be? I would forgive myself. For what? Well, we are so quick to take it all on our shoulders and try to do good and be good. Sometimes we fall short, in the minds of others and perhaps in our own minds. We may tell ourselves, "If only I had done this or that (better) then maybe..." in a cycle of blame and shame that can only be broken by forgiveness...of the self.

In a conversation with a dear friend last night she asked me what I had to forgive myself for. It was an inspiring question. It made me think. It made me turn inward and come up with: "I need to forgive myself first, before I can forgive anyone else." Forgiveness starts with the self because if we can look at our own humanity, our own areas of discomfort and pain, then forgive ourselves for anything we have done to deepen or prolong that pain, then we can move on to forgive those who collude with us to keep that pain going.

Self-forgiveness is empowering. Have you forgiven yourself lately?


  1. Hmm... an interesting question.

    Thanks for giving me something to think about.


  2. OMG! Kelly, what a powerful question! Never thought of that before. I absolutely love your last sentence: "self-forgiveness is empowering".
    Thank you for such a great post! Keep writing these inspiring messages.

  3. Your blog is done with real class.

  4. Dear Misha, Claudia and Anthony:
    Thank you for your wonderful feedback! It makes me happy to know these posts have an impact. If we can make a difference in only one person's life, then we have the potential to reach millions.

  5. To forgive yourself will permit you to release the tension and the guilt you feel inside and in return will make you feel stronger and more confident to continue learning in your journey. Thanks for your posts Kelly!

  6. Line, I like what you say about releasing guilt. I would agree that the guilt we feel does us no good, ergo the need for forgiveness.


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