Necessary Losses

Have you ever had to lose something in order to gain something else? Perhaps you left a job in order to gain a career, or let your child grow and go, gaining an adult but experiencing the loss of an empty nest. Perhaps it was more profound, such as a life change.

Change often involves a loss and usually involves a gain. That gain might not be immediate. And how we wish it was! It requires that we let go. Sometimes, even when they are not serving us well, we hold steadfastly to our ideals, our goals, our dreams just so we don't have to experience the pain of loss. Life circumstances might force our hand, making us take that risk, break out of our comfort zone and cut loose, creating a necessary loss. And in the end, a greater good prevails.

Judith Viorst explores this very deep reality of the human condition in her book Necessary Losses. Her best-selling classic on love, loss and letting go helps one to put into perspective, what living through inevitable change is all about.


  1. Hi Kelly,
    Another inspirational post from you! You know what amazes me the most? That there are some people in this world oblivious to these losses. Sad, huh? These people don't realize or don't care about losing something or don't care about gaining something positive out of a loss. I've lost so-called friends but BETTER ones came along ;) I've lost jobs and BETTER opportunities fell on my lap. At the time, it felt more like a punishment, but I later realized that having gone through those losses made me a better person. I think's there's a yin and yang in everything. Thank you for sharing this post. I've gained a new perspective on losses.

  2. Thank you Claudia for sharing your perspective about better opportunities arising out of loss, especially the yin and yang aspect of it. I've always subscribed to that notion of the light within the dark and vice versa. It helps me to understand the human condition.

  3. I suppose you gain something when you change diapers.

  4. LOL Nick, yes, a clean, dry baby! And that is one case where losing your sense of smell wouldn't be such a loss after all!

  5. Hi Kelly,
    Great post. I'm starting to feel that one loss is turning into a snowball effect of something better. I like it.

  6. Thanks, Dar! Yes, many losses can be huge, and if you can see the greater good of something better, in the longer term, these losses can actually be a GAIN. Thank you for your insightful comment. :-))


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